Saffron Gets A Bad Rap

March 8, 2013 at 8:15 am | Posted in Beauty, Honey Pony, Horses, The Real Housewives | 4 Comments
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A dear friend from down south once told me that the following is a very “Yankee” exchange:photo

Friend: “Ooooo, I love those shoes!”
Me (the Yankee): “Thanks!
(hushed whisper) 9-West. Marden’s Factory Closeout Store. $19.99!!”

Apparently we frugal Yankees are extremely proud of a bargain and not only seek them out, but then proceed to tell everyone who will listen what a steal we got. Apparently this does not happen in other parts of the country. I did notice Lisa Vanderpump giving Kyle Richards the business about showing up to an event in identical shoes and insisting that Kyle must have gotten them “off the sale rack”. Kyle looked none too pleased about this accusation. I would have been like, “Yeah, I did, bitch. Are you really stupid enough to pay full price?” Yankee.

And recently, I read an article about spending habits that put forth the following hypothesis: One’s idea of “expensive” is directly related to the first thing they buy that day. So, if you go online and buy a $200 bathing suit (Ahem, Spanx with tummy control and lots of DD boob lift.), then you’ll think that the $180 pair of jeans they try to sell you at check-out (“People who bought this also bought…” The ultimate keeping-up-with-the-Kardashians/Joneses ploy.) is not really all that expensive after all. But if you pop into T.J. Maxx for a quick browse and stop first at the $5.99 tights rack, well, you might not drop $149.99 on that Michael Kors bag, even if you CAN compare it to the MSRP (that’s Manufacturer’s Suggested Retail Price, for those of you who are not rabid bargain-hunters) of $289.00.

So all this got me thinking about my own spending habits and what I consider expensive. A little look into my spending psyche:

Beauty Bucks

– Getting talked into spending $60 on foundation that is not the right color or texture for your skin by the adorable and heart-breakingly hip make-up store girl with the perfect cats-eye eyeliner = face-too-dark-from-spray-tan-21396414[1]EXPENSIVE

– $20 self-tanners that leave giant brown stains on the couch in the precise shape of your bodacious booty = EXPENSIVE

– Spending just about any amount of money on anything (short of plastic surgery) that will make you look even 5 minutes younger = NOT EXPENSIVE

 

Travel Tariffs

– Spending $65 to have a car service meet you at the airport when you could easily grab a filthy, smelly cab complete with bullet-proof glass between you and the driver into town for $25 = NOT EXPENSIVE

– Thinking those leopard-print spandex pants the cocktail waitresses at the Jungle Bar in Miami Beach are wearing are super-duper cute and rushing right out the next day to buy yourself a pair = EXPENSIVE (I don’t care what they cost. You don’t look like she did in them and you will never, ever wear them out in public when you get home. Let’s just agree that you got caught up in the moment. And the mojitos.)

– Anything you buy at the hotel gift shop, mountainside ski shop, surfside cabana or in-room amenities bar = EXPENSIVE x2

 

Equine Expenses

– Spending $400 on fancy schmancy full-seat breeches that are just going to get dirty the second you put them on anyway (you know your horse is going to rub his snotty nose on them, right?) and probably won’t keep you in the saddle during your new green show mount’s inevitable spook/swerve/buck at the judge’s booth = EXPENSIVE11235[1]

– Spending $60 on a double-hot-pink halter with your cute-as-a-button pony’s name stitched on the nose when a $19.99 one would do the trick just fine = NOT EXPENSIVE

– $5.00/bag for pine shavings that sawmills otherwise consider trash = EXPENSIVE

– $150 for chiropractic work, $80 for acupuncture and a $50 massage (this is for the horse, not you!) so that Lightning won’t flip over on the crossties the next time you slap a saddle on his back = NOT EXPENSIVE

 

Food Fares

– Paying $45 for the most amazing piece of Kobe beef you’ve ever tasted in a charming and elegant restaurant setting without anyone climbing under the table and squirming into your booth because they “need to snuggle you” or standing on their seat to stare at the poor old lady sitting behind you = NOT EXPENSIVE

– Spending $8 on clearly pre-processed meatloaf in a place that is supposed to be making everything from scratch. At least they have microbrews to get you through the meal. But of course they’re out of the one you really like = EXPENSIVE

Best SaffronSo what is truly expensive, anyway? The first time I heard that saffron is the most expensive spice in the world, I thought it must be really outrageous and who in their right mind would pay for it? Then I went to the Hannaford and there it was: $14.99 for a small jar of saffron threads. I mean, I suppose compared to the Cream of Tartar that’s a little steep, but I’m pretty sure it’s cheaper than an organic cucumber. I guess it’s all relative, especially if you’ve just been to the Dollar Store.

So the next time I’m feeling down and need a little treat, I think I’ll go splurge on some saffron and live like the rich people do. Care to join me?

xo

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Bedazzled

October 24, 2012 at 8:17 pm | Posted in Beauty, Kids, The Real Housewives | 6 Comments
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I wore sparkly, bedazzled jeans to school drop-off, gymnastics, karate, and the grocery store today.

I know they were completely out of place in those venues. I realize they might have been a bit over-the-top. Even 6-year-old Brady, after rubbing my bejeweled butt for a minute, proclaimed them to be “weird”. But I just got them and I love them, so shut UP!

I also love make-up and hairspray (raised in the 80s, anyone?), and those things are hard to love here in Maine. There’s a whole juggernaut of plain-Janes running around. A regulation-sized soccer field full of Sporty Spices. Hey, I’m sporty. I mountain bike. I ride horses, and that is a dirty-ass sporty sport! But I still like spangled jeans and sparkly eye shadow.

This is probably an ongoing surprise to my Mom, who had to fight me into every dress I ever wore as a little girl. They were mostly reserved for Sundays at church, and I can still remember asking her why God cared if we were dressed up or not. Could He even see us? “Of course He can,” she replied, “It’s HIS HOUSE!” And now I’m appalled at what I see in church – spaghetti-strap tank tops that show your titty tattoos and short-shorts that would make Daisy Duke blush (are you even wearing underwear??).

But I digress.

The thing is just that… I love BEAUTY and everything that goes with it! Putting on make-up every day is like my own personal art project. Can I wear green eye shadow with this purple top? Does this shade of lipstick make my skin look grey? Will I ever be brave enough to wear those false eyelashes out in public?

I guess the real question is: How much is too much for a stay-at-home mom?

This is probably very dependent on where you live. Those babes on The Real Housewives of Orange County/Beverly Hills/NYC/New Jersey are always dripping with double-decker glam. Whether it be for a trip to the opera or a quick jaunt to the grocery store (as if they actually EAT), it seems sequins and 5-inch heels are never off limits. How do they tend to their kids in those get-ups? With small children, I have to bend over constantly, and this is no small feat in low-slung jeans (hello, butt-crack), short skirts (um, other crack) or low-cut tops (that’s technically not a crack). And try doing that while maintaining your composure (and dignity and modesty) while wearing platform wedges! Of course, if you’re lucky, your kid will throw a fit in whatever public place you happen to be and you’ll have to pick up all 38 pounds of whirling, writhing, screaming child in your razor-thin stilettos and carry him out. Meanwhile, you were wondering if those shoes could actually hold YOUR post-baby poundage, never mind you plus the butterball that is your 3-year-old. Good luck with that.

It’s tough being a Mom who still wants to look hot. Or at least human. I was recently at a 5-year-old’s birthday party that was held at a gym. I thought I looked cute and somewhat appropriate in my embroidered sleeveless top and white capris. Then in walked a mother ‘from away’ (Mainer talk for ‘you don’t live here’) wearing a tight black top and jeans with carefully placed rips all up and down the front of them. And in the rips were…. wait for it… GOLD BEADS!!! Rows and rows of them!! I scoffed and turned away. Clearly this woman did not know what to wear to a child’s birthday party! But on the inside, I died a little. I wanted to wear jeans like that and get away with it!!

So how to marry the two? Here is what I propose:

– The false eyelashes and red patent-leather handbag make the cut when you’re going out to dinner, not to the soccer field.

– Save the heavy glitter eye make-up and over-the-top lipliner for drinks with the girls, but don’t be afraid to dust on a little shimmer here and there on a daily basis.

– If you’re going to wear high heels of any type with your kids in tow, make sure you have the hubs with you to handle any “Pick me UUUPPPP!!!!”s that come your way.

– Bouffe (I think I made that word up) up your hair like crazy for weddings, evening parties and trips to the big city, but let’s keep it casual for the girls’ softball team, ok?

– And never, ever, under any circumstances does mascara make your butt look big. So slather it on, girls. Every day, all the time.

xo

Feeding Frenzy

September 3, 2012 at 8:48 am | Posted in Beauty, Uncategorized | 2 Comments
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It’s never good when you suddenly don’t need your belt anymore.

As in: Hmmm, I swear the last time I wore these shorts I really needed this belt to keep them from sliding down my hips. How come I don’t need it today? They seem to be staying up all on their own. In fact, they might even be a little bit tight… Uh oh.

Could it be ‘vacation fat’ syndrome? You know, “I’m on vacation, so I’ll just… eat dessert after every meal… have a huge breakfast every morning (it’s a buffet, after all)… make sure I keep my strength up with a chocolate bar every afternoon… have cheese and crackers with artichoke dip on the porch every day at 4:00… try everything on the menu in the gourmet restaurant… keep the frozen drinks coming…”   Accompanied, of course, by the I’ve-just-hiked-a-mountain-(ok-it-was-really-a-1-hour-walk-up-a-slight-incline)-so-I-must-have-burned-4,000-calories-and-really-deserve-this-rack-o-ribs-cornbread-nachos-brownie-sundae-meal syndrome.

What is it about being on vacation (even if for just a quick weekend get-away) that inspires uninhibited eating in an “I deserve it” sort of way? And of course, the whole time, I’m just trying to get my kids to eat SOMETHING as I continually overindulge.

All you guys want is chicken fingers and mac and cheese again? At home you eat everything!  Come on, you’re going to get scurvy or leprosy or some other life-threatening disease from all the salt and preservatives! Hey, where are you going? Sit down! Dont bother those people over there! Leave the waiter alone! Eat some more of that food! Why can’t you guys sit still and eat? Am I going to have to shove some of that food down your gullet? If I had my way, I’d eat CONSTANTLY!

Oh wait, I guess I got my way…

So back to the shorts. It COULD be vacation. Or it just could be that I’m a sugar hound. Or that I pretend to count calories while constantly faking it in my favor. As in, “Whole grain spelt bread with peanut butter and honey. So healthy! Let’s see, two slices of bread = 160 calories, good. Peanut butter = 100 calories/tablespoon. Well, how much did I really have? Couldn’t have been more than one tablespoon (meanwhile the thickly-spread PB is oozing off of both slices of toast and onto the plate) so… 100 calories there. Honey = 60 calories/Tbsp. Well, really, how much honey could I have used? (More dripping off the bread.) Must be like a half-teaspoon so total for this snack is 270 calories! I have SO much self-control!!”

Yeah, those are the kinds of games I play with myself.

When I was in high school, we actually had a ritual around eating – or as we called it in the 80s, ‘pigging out’. One or the other of us would invite each other for a sleep-over and as we were hanging up (remember, we actually had to CALL each other back in those days), we’d casually say, “Bring your eating clothes”. That was the sign. That meant there was going to be a feeding frenzy in between the MTV music videos and episodes of the A-Team, which generally included the following staples: Nacho Cheese Doritos (the only flavor they had back then), Nutter Butters, Munchos (a much-better predecessor to Pop Chips), chocolate chip or Oreo ice cream, and chocolate in just about any form.

What were ‘eating clothes’? Anything with a stretchy waistband that you didn’t mind spilling something on. That should really be required for most get-togethers today. How often have you spilled your wine or olive-oil-infused bruschetta on your favorite dress or shirt? If everyone just wore sweat pants and old t-shirts it would be so much easier. We could dress it up a little by wearing them with high heels and lots of big hair and make-up. Wait a minute, I think I may have just described a few of my outfits back in the 80s.

But once again I digress. I need to figure out what happened to these shorts. Maybe I shrunk them? Maybe the belt stretched out? Too bad I don’t have a teenage daughter so I could claim that my clothes got mixed up with her size 2’s. At any rate, why don’t you all come on over? And wear your eating clothes. It’s Labor Day weekend, after all…

xo

Mommy’s Modern Life

July 14, 2012 at 3:24 pm | Posted in Beauty, Horses, Kids | 2 Comments
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I drink organic tea with piles of Equal in it.

This is just one of a plethora of paradoxes that plague my everyday existence.

I drink the organic tea because I recently read that the Lipton Tea I had been drinking for years was found to have traces of nasty carcinogens and pesticides in it. And because, in general, I like to eat/drink organic or as farm-fresh as possible as often as possible.

I use the chemical-laden Equal artificial sweetener because I don’t want to get fat.

The list goes on and on.

I seek out the most all-natural, BPA-free, GMO-free, fragrance-free, dye-free, rat-poison-free, bug-particle-free body washes and lotions for my children. I wash them lovingly in these products, thinking what a great thing I am doing for them. Then I tromp upstairs to my own bathroom and slather myself in anti-aging creams and potions filled with ingredients lists I cannot pronounce, much less attempt to comprehend. Sure, there are a few “shea butters” and “chamomile extracts” thrown in there, but for the most part, those suckers are filled with nasty plastics and nano-particles that will probably have my skin looking “plump and fresh” long after my dried up carcass is in the ground.

I love my animals like they are my children and want to save every one of the abused and suffering ones in the world. “How can anybody do that to an animal?” I intone, referring to some abuse case or another, all muffled through intermittent chomps on my cheeseburger. Who’s saving those cows, Draghetti?

(sigh) I also:

  • Seek out the most organic, paraben-free, no-animal-testing lip balms I can find, then slather my lips with semi-permanent lipstick every morning. What type of self-adhesive polymers do you think they use to make that stuff stay on your lips all day – even through that hefty plate of nachos??
  • Try to save the planet by recycling every scrap of paper, shred of cardboard and cylinder of tin I can find, then drive off to the redemption center in my giant, gas-guzzling SUV.
  • Buy my cats high-end, all-natural cat food, then apply poison to their skin in the form of Frontline Flea & Tick repellent. (But how else am I supposed to keep the buggies off??)
  • Ditto for the horses: I give them all-natural supplements and perfectly balanced diets, then apply a thorough spraying of chemical-laden bug spray. Hey, the all-natural ones just don’t work that well, and I don’t want to get bucked off because a horsefly just bit one of my geldings on the privates!

Last week, my mother brought cheese puffs to a party at my house. “Cheese puffs??!” I snorted, “Don’t give any of those to my children!!”  Later that night after everyone was gone, I realized I had been too busy to eat dinner and went straight for my secret stash of Ring Dings. Who am I fooling, really?

Back in the day (not really sure what that means, but the ‘young people’ say it so it must be cool), there was this funny little cartoon called “Rocko’s Modern Life”. It was about an Australian wallaby and his bewildering journey through life, where he constantly encountered ironies such as mine. I often think of that little character as I purchase organic vegetables wrapped in carcinogen-emitting plastic. It all just seems to be part of the modern world. No matter how hard you try to eat/look/be healthy and take good care of the planet, some of that new-fangled scientific stuff is going to sneak in. I guess I’ll just have to shrug it off and keep trying.

Besides, nothing is going to get between me and some really good wrinkle cream. Or a fresh box of Ring Dings.

xo

Age vs. Beauty

June 16, 2012 at 6:45 am | Posted in Beauty, Uncategorized | 1 Comment
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Someone please explain this to me:

Men get better looking as they get older.

Women start looking like old hags. (I include myself in this description.)

Case in point: When men get salt & pepper hair, it is somehow both fitting and sexy. A few crinkles around the eyes are disarming and still attractive (think George Clooney on both of these accounts). When older men get deep tans (from golfing, boating, bird-watching, etc.), it makes them look even better. Even a slight paunch on an older man is easy to ignore and doesn’t really affect his overall look.

Now let’s take a look at the situation for women:

The second a woman gets even one gray hair, it ages her by about 10 years. Salt and pepper makes a 40-year-old look 60. And I don’t even want to go into the “all gray” look.

Our “crinkles” are called “crow’s feet” (where did THAT attractive saying come from?) and a crow might as well have pooped on our face for all the damage those do. “She looks pretty young until she smiles and you see all those wrinkles around her eyes!” No wonder those pre-Botox society ladies held their faces so stock still and never smiled! They didn’t want to make or show any more crow’s feet!!

And natural (not spray) deep tans on older women just look, well, gross. Their skin looks leathery (why is it that men’s skin seems to look smoother and more glowy when they get tan??), the already-present age spots and extra freckles show up even more, and they simply look like they’re trying too hard.

Don’t even get me started on what 2 extra pounds do to us women over 40. No “paunch” is acceptable, nor are the spreading hips or saggy upper arms. You have to remain a stick (I recently read that a young starlet is on a 1200 calorie-per-day diet. 1200 CALORIES PER DAY!!! I can eat 1200 calories in one sitting and not even feel full!!). We all know staying that thin is nearly impossible, especially as you get a little older. Except for that g-d Sarah Jessica Parker, who is at least starting to look a bit haggard in all her skinny-ness.

What type of nasty trick is Mother Nature playing on us? Or perhaps I should call he/she FATHER Nature!

So now we are supposed to hold onto our men when they keep getting better looking, and we’re stuck slathering ourselves with creams and potions, hair tints and spray tans. And of course there are so many young cuties walking around, flaunting their cellulite-free legs, fake boobs and flat tummies.

So, in the spirit of sisterhood, here are a few of my tips on how age beautifully and gracefully, all while keeping your ever-better-looking man interested and engaged:

  • Never let your hair go gray. Ever. Not even one tiny little strand! Sorry, girls, but this is the cold hard truth. Love it or leave it.
  • Dress the part. By now we know what looks good on our body types. We also know what looks good on teenagers and that ne’er the two shall meet. You got it, flaunt it, but do it tastefully and age-appropriately. (Last night I saw a woman out dancing who had to be at best in her mid-60’s. Despite the frighteningly-obvious pulled-tight plastic surgery and the lithe body, she looked ridiculous in her midriff-baring sparkly top, 14 bracelets on each arm, spiky-hair rocker ‘do, right arm tattoo and I-don’t-know-how-many earrings and ear clips in each ear. Face it, honey, you are an older woman, and you DON’T look good in the latest Jeffrey Sebelia designs!)
  • Never let ‘em see you sweat. Confidence, ladies. If there’s one thing I learned in my 30s and (still early) 40s it’s that I’ve got it going on in so many more ways than one. I know who I am, what I stand for, and what I want in life. This is very sexy. Trust me.
  • Be as sweet as nine-layer pie (Mmmm, I want me some of that. Oh, but the hips). You know your man better than anyone, and you can always out-sweet those nasty, spoiled, immature little floozies.
  • And whatever you do, don’t try to be something you’re not. Your man, friends, family and everyone else in your life loves you for you. So be the fabulous, amazing, gray-hair-hiding woman that you are. I love you that way, and so do they.

xo

A Use for Algebra

June 9, 2012 at 6:55 am | Posted in Beauty, Horses, Kids | 2 Comments
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I can’t believe it. I’ve finally found a use for all that Algebra I had to take in high school. This stuff doesn’t come easy, so be gentle with me. Following are my very own set of hypotheses:

If car = clean, then children will make an extra effort to spill juice, scatter muffin crumbs, and smear dirty feet on the backs and bases of seats. Good choice on the light-colored interior, Mom.

If morning = busy with many out-of-the-ordinary tasks and commitments, then children will be cranky, over-tired, naughty, rotten, highly emotional, quarrelsome and unhelpful. As will Mom.

If visit = in-laws, then children will be cranky, over-tired, naughty, rotten, highly emotional, quarrelsome and unhelpful. They will also completely regress, losing their ability to eat a meal, use the toilet and sleep past 4:00 a.m. I’m including teenagers in this theory.

If corner of furniture = pointed, then child will certainly find a way to bang his head on it, especially if he is having his picture taken the next day or visiting relatives who never see him and already question your parenting skills.

If vacation week = rainy, then house, hotel room, camper, etc. will have 453 toys strewn across the floor of each room, the television will break, the Internet will go down and all that paint you saved for a rainy day will be completely dried up. Oh, and BounceZone will be closed due to a power outage.

If toy = expensive, then child will ignore it. Cheap toys from China will be played with consistently for the 45 minutes it takes them to break, then said child will be inconsolable.

If horse = expensive, it will be sick with something akin to the swine flu when you bring it home, go inexplicably  lame by the time it’s five, and cost 300x what you spent to buy it to train it to do the basics. Cheap horses are never sick or lame and they live to be 40. Unexplainable.

If day = windy, horse will find that previously unnoticed red maple leaf to be a weapon of mass destruction, see a ghost in the corner of the arena, and will have learned to jump 30 feet straight up into the air at the slightest touch of your left heel. Probably best to stay off his back this day, because that is likely where you will end up.

If door = closed, then cat will stare at it, scratch it and whine at it until it is opened. Then cat will turn its nose up and ignore it as you stand in 20 degree temperatures in your underwear.

And of course, the coup de gras:

If hair day = good, then you will have absolutely, positively no place to go and no one to see.

xo

What is Wrong with My Mirrors?

April 23, 2012 at 8:42 pm | Posted in Beauty, The Real Housewives | 4 Comments
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Is it just me, or does everyone get dressed, look in the mirror and think they look pretty good leaving the house, only to be shocked by their later reflection in a door or window that gets them thinking, “Do I really look that fat today?” or “My pants are too short!” or “These shoes totally don’t go with this outfit!” or “Why does my hair look frizzy?”

What is wrong with my mirrors?? Why don’t I see that before I leave the house? Is there some “thin magic” in my mirror that prevents me from seeing that those pants paired with that top make me look like a kumquat? Do I think that just because I can see the bottoms of my pants that this means they are actually falling below my ankles? And does it really take just a whisper of wind to completely destroy my carefully coiffed hair? I just don’t get it.

I suppose trying to keep up with the looks of the ladies of the Real Housewives of You-Name-the-Place isn’t helping my self-image, either. Those chicks must spend 40 hours a week in the salon/spa/dentist/plastic surgeon’s office. It must be a full-time job to maintain it all. I think I’m high-maintenance, but I can’t hold a candle to those girls. I even got some veins done in my legs last year (I just couldn’t stand the look of a large varicose vein on my right leg – thank you pregnancy – so I had it removed along with a few smaller ones) and the damn things are coming back!! Those ladies must either slather their legs in make-up (spray-tans appear to be mandatory in California) or they are seeing their vascular surgeons on a weekly basis.

It’s disheartening. We’re all supposed to keep up with the Kardashians but really, who has the time? Besides, those girls give new meaning to the term “falsies”. Fake eyelashes, lips, hair, boobies and both sets of cheeks. How are the rest of us supposed to ‘keep up’?

All that said, I’d like to share a few of my favorite beauty products – some new finds, some old stand-bys. Not that I’m so fabulous, but I do work hard at this stuff and hey, I’m always looking for new ideas and recommendations, so perhaps you are, too. Feel free to add your own tips in the Comments section 🙂 .

  • I always love a good Spanx foundation garment. They are the savior of many a dress and pair of pants in my closet. But let’s face it, you can’t wear those puppies every day, and sometimes not even all day. But I have finally found a Spanx product I can wear all day and love. It’s called “Bra-llelujah”. And it is. A wonderful, stretchy, yet supportive full-coverage bra that actually holds the girls up while feelin’ fine and lookin’ good. Love it. Getting some more.
  • Bare Minerals Make-up. My love affair with this mineral foundation and eye shadow began 6 years ago when I was up in the middle of the night nursing my first-born and watching infomercials. By the way, that’s also when my love affair with the Real Housewives started, as the OC was in its first season and there were midnight and early a.m. re-runs. But I digress… It takes a little time to learn how to apply this foundation, but once you get it right it is flawless. And GOOD for your skin! So many make-up products have so much artificial and harmful junk in them, but not Bare Minerals. I am also in love with their eye-brightening eyelid foundation product called “Well-Rested”. Makes you look wide awake and alert, even when you’re not. And we all know that those of us with small children and/or high-octane careers more often than not, are not.
  • Vitamins, fish oil, and other healthy stuff you put in your body. Ok, I’m a junk-food junkie, I admit it. It is a daily battle for me not to live on Double Dutch chocolate muffins and pizza washed down with diet soda. I try to put the good things in as often as possible, but I still eat way too much sugar, salt and melted cheese. SO, I try to balance this out by taking excellent vitamins and other supplements, among them MSM (joint health and inflammation – too many falls of my horses over the years!), Coenzyme Q10 (heart & cell rejuvenation), fish oil (Omega 3’s, etc.), and spirulina (a blue-green algae with TONS of health benefits).
  • While it is important to work on beauty from the inside out, don’t skip the sunscreen and moisturizer, ok?

    This looks good, right?

Try a few of these things and I promise you’ll look even better than you already do. Or at least my magic mirrors say so.

xo

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